Wednesday, March 29, 2006
ytd, talked to e guys regarding our problems and i found out one thing.. as much as db and i find it hard to stay wif e crowd, it's oso hard for dem to include us into e crowd.. mayb it is lyk as dey said, we purposely left a gap.. a gap which dey dunno how to fill.. but dey were not e only ones.. db and i oso dunno how to fill dat gap.. it juz happened.. cos e 2 of us were more of an introvet.. we keep everything to ourselves.. even i oso dun understand db very much.. db oso does not noe everything abt me.. mayb it's juz us ba.. i really cant bring myself to open up everything abt me.. cos i dun think anyone will ever understand ba.. not even db.. it's lyk.. a whole shroud of mistrust is surrounding me.. i cant see any light... everywhere i looked, i see darkness.. mayb i dun ask for u guys to understand me.. all i ask for u guys is to juz gif me a hand wen i need it most.. dere's a lot of times when i need a hand to pull me up.. no one's dere.. not even db.. i've learnt how to depend on myself since dunno how long ago.. and all i can say is dat i'm really very tired of depending on myself.. but den.. i cant expect too much.. dere's still db.. and van.. dey oso need e guys.. nvm.. i think i'll go talk to my toys..sometimes i really envy guys.. i mean, everything is so simple to dem.. i dun understand y girls cant think lyk guys... i wan to think lyk dem too.. but i'm a girl.. so i tend to look into things a little too deep.. ahhh!!!!!!!!! frustrated.. wish i dun feel how i feel, i dun think how i think.. pui.. wat e hell am i talking abt? it's simple la.. juz lyk gray said.. girls and guys will forever b diff.. e way we do things, say things and think will b diff.. haix.. so guys will nv understand how girls feel and girls will nv understand how guys feel.. so simple.. took me so long to understand.. anywayz.. we can always come to an agreement.. here's how i think it shld b.. everyone will remain as frenz.. u call, we might or might not go out.. we call, u oso might or might not go out.. so it's settled.. i guess dat's all for today.. bye
but no one ever calls me out.. cos i'm forgettable..